:p

Reading your letter, I kept thinking about how much effort it takes to carry this alone. You desire isolation, but it sounds less like a wish for peace and more like a belief that you are a burden. Those are not the same thing. Your pain doesn't need to win a competition to deserve attention. Believing you are a burden, or that being "good" means taking up as little space as possible, are familiar thoughts but familiarity isn't proof. Allowing someone to know you are struggling isn't forcing them to carry you; it’s just inviting them to walk beside you. When you spend all your energy surviving, arriving in a future you never planned for can feel like entering a city without a map. It is lonely and confusing. So, don't worry about suddenly changing everything. Just ask yourself; “What is one small choice I can make today that belongs to someone who expects to be here tomorrow?” A tiny investment is still an investment. Thank you for writing this instead of keeping it entirely to yourself. Reaching out is a choice of connection over isolation and that is exactly where a different kind of life begins.